Dr Perpetua Neo
The Neo Café

I write in cafés all over the world about mastering your time, mind and sleep. As a Café Person since I was 11, I’ve christened my blog The Neo Café— for your dose of Mastering Your Psychological Capital, my signature blend of cutting-edge neuroscience, psychology and ancient wisdom– in plain English for busy high-performers like yourself who want quick and thorough solutions. My work’s available in 41 languages, and here’s how we can partner together.

ALL PHOTOGRAPHS ARE TAKEN OR OWNED BY ME, UNLESS OTHERWISE STATED.

  • Having An Anxiety Relapse? Here’s Why. And Here’s The Way Out.

    The relief from feeling significantly more in control after a particularly anxious chapter is oh-so-sweet. And we all hope that we never feel that kind of anxiety again.

    But what if a new episode in your life reintroduces those same feelings? A racing tornado of a mind, fast heartbeat and clammy palms, and hypervigilantly looking out for how…

  • What Are Dark Empaths?

    We often think of empathy as an amazing thing. Most of us believe that empathy is the solution to cruelty and aggression and generally leads to better outcomes, from sales to productivity to customer relationships. Hence, empathy training is recommended for anyone, from prisoners to doctors to teachers.

    Indeed, deficits in empathy are thought to be at the…

  • How To Talk To Anyone- A Summary, Especially For Introverts Who Hate Networking

    When I was younger, I used to joke that I had an STD called Small Talk Disorder. I’d be flummoxed, tongue-tied, checking myself, and then leaving the encounter replaying it in my head. Going through it with an unnecessarily fine-toothed comb and beating myself up, before dreading the next encounter.

    While my 30-something-year-old self now understands why this…

  • If Your Life Makes You Miserable, Why Not Consider Designing #EverydayAmazing?

    Nod your head if you’re someone who counts down to their holiday, then feels you cannot escape that tornado in your head while you’re on it, and then you get so guilty you’re not engaged enough with the people you’re around or the experience you’ve paid good money for. Or nod your head if you refuse to…

  • Why Do People Stay In Abusive Relationships

    I’ve received the entire gamut of questions about why I was in an abusive relationship, even as a psychologist, from the curious to the compassionate to the sanctimonious. When I was younger, I’d give the excuse that I was practically a child, and I didn’t know better.

    But the truth is, anyone at any age, at any level…

  • How To Boost Brain Energy

    Imagine if you woke up with 100 energy credits everyday. The things you do either take away from that, or add to that. So you have to spend these gold nuggets wisely.

    Then imagine if you had poorer sleep, more background stress, or compromised physical health– you wake up with way less than 100 energy credits. Seen this…

  • Read this if you only take care of your physical health and not your mental health.

    I am a clinical psychologist who does not talk about mental health 24-7. I roll my eyes when someone preaches it too much, or obsesses over minutiae and sinks in analysis-paralysis without taking action. Whilst there is a place for normalising the very experience of being human, and learning to accept that it comes with messy emotions…